“One got pregnant from a grandfather with dementia”: who goes to work as a caregiver

“One got pregnant from a grandfather with dementia”: who goes to work as a caregiver

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The work of a nurse and assistant caring for elderly and sick family members has always been and will be in demand. In theory, this work should be undertaken by people not only with medical skills, but also with certain qualities of the soul. Alas, this is not always the case. “MK” spoke with those who know about the pitfalls in this area, where not everything is so rosy for female applicants.

In specialized telegram channels you can see a lot of vacancies for nurses, often with accommodation. On average, caregivers are offered 50,000–70,000 rubles. per month, but there are urgent announcements when customers do not spare money. For example, in one of the advertisements (Moscow, Airport metro station) a nurse is promised 100,000–120,000 rubles for living with a bedridden patient in a 1-room apartment. Here are recent examples of earnings: in the city of Domodedovo, a salary of 55,000 rubles is offered for living in the same room with a ward and medical care. plus food, a shared table (with my working son). In St. Petersburg, a 92-year-old woman (walking) is given 60,000 rubles for living together and helping her; duties include cooking, cleaning, and monitoring medications.

hh.ru “MK” provided the following figures: the increase in vacancies for nurses in 2023 compared to 2022 was 150%. If last year there were 1386 of them, then this year there are already 2090. At the same time, 2517 resumes were submitted this year, that is, there is a competition of 1.2 people per place. Salaries, according to hh.ru, have increased: last year the average salary offered was 45,200 rubles, and this year it is 50,200 rubles.

In one of the advertisements we see the requirements: “Any nationality, good Russian, sociable and patient, not constantly on the phone, preferably an orphan. Approximately 40–60 years.” But the overwhelming majority of customers want a “Slavic”. “Be prepared that grandma likes to communicate and watches a lot of TV” – there are also such notes. You can find a job as an au pair “with income” – 1500–3000 rubles. in one visit.

“I don’t work with accommodation, I have schoolchildren, so I work several hours a day,” nurse Zarina, a native of Tajikistan who has lived in Moscow for a long time, told MK. — After school, I completed exercise therapy and massage courses. In 2019, I had a problem: my daughter fell from the 5th floor (she has now recovered), and I needed to be near her and at the same time live on something. So I started caring for elderly people. The work is hard. It is especially difficult to care for patients diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or other diseases associated with conduct disorder. I earn little, 1500 rubles. in a day. RUB 45,000 per month. But there are also positive aspects in my work: when a person is lying down and you understand that he expects help from you and that you can make someone’s life easier, it makes me happy. At this time you think that someone is much worse off than you. And you say thank you to the Almighty for walking with your own feet.”

“I can say that the demand for caregivers is growing,” Polina Petrova, director of the social assistance center “Assistance” (in three regions of the Russian Federation), told MK. — Relatives prefer to hire assistants for elderly parents so as not to be torn between family, work and caring for loved ones. Payment for nurses is on average 200–250 rubles. per hour, with accommodation – about 50,000–60,000 rubles. per month. This position is often filled by women over 50 years of age who have personal experience of caring for seriously ill loved ones, or retired health workers who are accustomed to saving people by their line of work.”

Alas, not all nurses are professionals in their field and have all the necessary “angelic” qualities: kindness, compassion, attentiveness, patience… The dark sides of the MK profession were told by a man who worked for many years as the head of a domestic staff recruitment agency, but has now changed This is a direction for organizing holidays. “Nurses were the most difficult contingent! — Yulia Lokteva from St. Petersburg told MK. — At seven in the morning on weekends and at night, it was applicants (not customers) who called me, that is, they do not know any standards of decency. They have the idea that everyone owes them and everyone is obliged to them. Most often, they cannot speak competently or formulate their expectations normally. Their main demand is “give me a salary of at least 80,000 rubles,” but they won’t even ask what they need to do. 90% of applicants had poor command of the Russian language. They couldn’t even fill out the questionnaire in Russian, so we compiled a questionnaire for them with three simple points. One fills it out, and three of them write off…

A big problem among them is alcoholism. For example, one of these sits with a grandfather with dementia, the relative who ordered it arrives and sees a picture: the grandfather is covered in feces, has not eaten for two days, and the nurse is in an indecent state. It often happens that caregivers try to snatch something from the food in the house (buckwheat, rice, etc.) in order to send it to their homeland. That is, money is money, but you need to get something else from the owners beyond the money…

As for customers, they usually downplay the complexity of the work or even hide the client’s diagnosis (they once hid an open form of tuberculosis). And the hardest thing is when a caregiver is needed for an elderly person with dementia. You can come and the gas is open…

There is also a nuance that customers do not want to hire young nurses. We had a case where a nurse (Ukrainian) managed to get pregnant from a grandfather suffering from dementia, he was about 65. His daughter lived in Finland, and at one point she arrived, and the apartment was with the nurse. And a baby sitter. My daughter came to our agency and began to make claims. What do we have to do with it?! And the nurse said: “I love him! This is my first love!

Published in the newspaper “Moskovsky Komsomolets” No. 29181 dated December 19, 2023

Newspaper headline:
Looking for a middle-aged sober nurse

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