“I will teach intimate sounds”: Russian relocators shocked Asia with startups

Not all relocators from the Russian Federation have a business that can be transferred to a new place of residence, or work that can be done remotely. Such people are looking for work in a new place, and there are fewer of them, so there are more and more Russian long-steers. Here comes the time of brainstorming, the results of which in some places have already been called “startup madness”.

We learned what kind of business plans surprise, and sometimes even shock, domestic startups in those parts of Asia to which they relocated.

In recent months, the number of start-ups with the participation of Russian capital in Turkey has grown 4 times with the sharpest jump in April, according to Turkish authorities.

– The Russians are leaders in establishing new businesses in our country, – comments a representative of one of the leading Turkish banks. – But this is also the merit of the new requirements for the Russians of our banking system.

It turns out that long-term relocators from the Russian Federation have so overloaded the Turkish banking system with requests for opening accounts and issuing cards that some banks have deliberately complicated the requirements for a package of documents. From now on, many of them require, among other things, a work permit in Turkey and an employment contract, or show income from their private business.

– The easiest “private business” is to buy real estate in Turkey not only to live on your own, but also to rent it out, – explains a relocant from the Russian Federation, who has been living on the Turkish Riviera in the Side region for 3 months. – This is both an investment in the Turkish economy and a long-term business. But not everyone has the money for it. And just like that, a Russian will not be hired here. If only an animator in the hotel, and then only for the season. Yes, and the requirements here are such that not everyone will agree, workers are swindled, especially in small businesses.

According to official data from the Turkish side, since the beginning of the year, Russians have registered 410 wholesale and retail companies in Turkey with a total capital of $125.26 million, $113.4 million of which is foreign capital, in this case Russian. But what exactly the compatriots are trading in is not very clear from the formal reports: in the 1st place there is some kind of “data transfer”, in the 2nd and 3rd places – communications and the Internet.

– This is software and information technology, – explains the relocant from the Russian Federation. – We already have such a joke going around here that we don’t sell pies, if anything, but programs. Prog is a program. Including original, by private orders. I won’t say which ones – the secrets are not mine, but client’s. Well, if in general terms, then this is artificial intelligence for home and family.

– A reasonable intercom, or something, which, as in a viral video, does not let the owners themselves into the house?

– Something like that. Security camera that recognizes secret danger signals given by the owner, adultery trackers, home lie detector and all that. Everything is exclusively in the private field. A program that teaches children music is in great demand.

But the deeper into Asia, the simpler, clearer and more incendiary Russian startups are.

“Those who expect to find a job in Kyrgyzstan, you can forget about it,” a local resident warns relocators, describing in her blog that since September 21, so many Russians have come to her country that all hotels, rented apartments and hostels are overcrowded, and those who are not lucky enough to find a place to stay, walk around the yards and ask to spend the night / live for a fee. – There is no work, but starting your own business is easy!

Apparently, it is not necessary to beg the resourceful Russians. So in the resort area of ​​Issyk-Kul, a weight loss academy has already appeared, based on mantras and diet. And in neighboring Kazakhstan – a school for survival in a nuclear explosion. But all this is nonsense compared to the “rage of Russian startups” per square meter of Goan land: there are practicing shamans / astrologers / tarologists / numerologists and schools for teaching their skills. And all kinds of academies and retreats on everything from self-knowledge and yoga to temple dances and mantropenia. In Goa, compatriots of all trades: at a reasonable price they will teach both silent vocals and intimate sounds (which should be made during sex to attract a partner and improve karma).

– Well, what if you need money! – explains the flight of fancy Russian goanka. – Do not sit back and wait for starvation! If there is no work, you need to invent it – and this is also work!

At the same time, our fellow citizens are proud that they are mainly engaged in the “intellectual” sphere, because “the Hindus themselves can bake cakes, this is not the highest mathematics.”