Abby Stein, story of a transition among ultra-Orthodox Jews

Pink has always been her favorite color. It was forbidden to him for a long time, considered unseemly in the community of Hasidic Jews dressed for the most part in black and white, which moreover is perfectly inappropriate to his genre. What could be more shocking and more contrary to religious laws, which advocate modesty and discretion, than a boy dressed in pink?

But, as far back as she can remember – for a garment, a satchel, a toy – the color attracted her. She envied her little sisters for owning a few Hello Kitty items. And, later, when she discovered that the young wife that was attributed to her also liked pink, it was a real pleasure. At least the couple would share a common taste.

We are therefore not surprised, on this day in April 2022, in Manhattan, to see Abby Stein appear at our meeting, dressed in a pink coat of classic shape, fitted, and a ruffled blouse from the same color, echoing the gloss affixed to her lips. The pallor and smooth character of his face framed by long, brown hair only stands out more. A porcelain complexion, we say to ourselves, fascinated by its transparency. A complexion of an old doll. The eyes are lively, joyful, quick; his face wonderfully expressive. As for the voice… A little hoarse, between two colors, two ranges? But the tone is so warm that you immediately have the impression of meeting a friend.

Double postage

She told her story in a book, not translated into French, published three years ago in the United States (Becoming Eve, “to become Eve”, Seal Press): that of a young boy born in 1991, in Brooklyn, in the strictest and most traditional community of Orthodox Jews, engaged at 18, certified rabbi at 19, father at 20, who had to flee to become what he knows to be, since his birth, his true nature: a woman. A story that looks like an epic as it is both magnificent and tragic, in search of a double emancipation: from an oppressive community which, to protect itself, forbids any deviation and questioning; and a destiny assigned by a non-gendered body.

Since then, Abby Stein has become the figurehead of defectors from ultra-Orthodoxy, to whom she gives hope; an ardent and charismatic LGBT activist; and an outstanding rabbi, non-believer, but viscerally attached to the values ​​of Judaism. Freedom ? The freedom to be oneself, fully oneself, in one’s body, in one’s choices, one’s way of life, one’s loves? She conquered it after years of struggle and inner suffering that she willingly shares. But where to start ?

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